This Busyness is Killing Me

If you've ever listened to The Ramones, you may think the title has a typo. I took a little license to help with my topic. The art of being busy. These days, we all seem to be experts in this skill. Life doesn't slow down. Work moves at a faster pace. Relationships drain us. And adulting is stressful. All four of those items do one thing, and that is to keep us busy. Are they avoidable? Possibly not. So how can we avoid the busyness they seem to bring? I'm so glad you asked! Let's break it down.

Life. Well, it happens and happens often. Obviously, I'm not talking about living, breathing, functioning Life. I'm referring to Murphy's Law or Karma or whatever you call it, Life. There are never enough plans or perfectly-created schedules to avoid Life sticking its big toe in the middle and stirring it all up. We can even have backup plans, but that makes Life laugh hysterically and say, "Watch this!" Being a planner carrying the proverbial checklist, I have had to accept the push/pull of my relationship with Life. One of the things I've had to overcome is not going into a project with a closed fist around my plans. I had to lead with open hands and an open mind knowing that the checklist would be updated, tossed, and restarted daily. I also cannot allow the curveball Life brings to keep me in the weeds. Focusing on the details without looking at the whole picture brings busyness. And it's busyness for the sake of being busy. To appropriately live with Life, we should ensure we are giving focus on what adds value and not what consumes our time.

Work. Many years ago, the director I supported said, "Work will still be here when you return in the morning. Time to go home." That was my first job, and I still use that phrase often. Because it's true. Work is always there. But not everything we do at work is value-driven. I understand sometimes it's unavoidable, and we must do menial tasks because systems haven't been improved over the years. But these should be the one-off tasks, not the day-in, day-out work we do. I evaluate my work each year to ensure I bring value to every job and create efficiencies where there is a lack. Automation is a beautiful thing! There are so many voices out there that believe automation or BOTs will eliminate jobs. Unfortunately, they are very misinformed. The more I automate my tasks, the more efficient I am at my job, and I can bring better value or service to my company. Continuing to do manual tasks or work that brings no value to keep your job will eventually backfire. Systems that are continually being updated will automate you right out of a job. Instead, it would be best to concentrate on staying current, bringing value, and not allowing work to keep you at the office. Instead, turn off the computer, close the notebook, leave the office, and enjoy your family and friends every night and every weekend. Work will still be there in the morning.

Relationships. Here's a challenging topic. Because this involves all relationships - family, friends, work, school, etc. The delicate balance of not giving a relationship freedom to cause unnecessary busyness resides within carefully constructed boundaries. The word boundaries can conjure up many different visuals. These are not walls to keep people out or even ways to be rude, critical, or mean. These are definitions you create for your life where you do not enable bad behavior, allow others to use your valuable time with non-value things, or bring you into a drama you cannot resolve. You aren't putting your head in the sand and ignoring others. You are creating an environment that doesn't bring busyness but adds value to your life and relationships. Because when you are in a state of busyness, anything you offer is less than what others or yourself deserve. You can't pour from an empty jug or even a broken one. Reacting to others because they "need" you may not be appropriate. True emergencies demand an immediate reaction, yes. But if everything is urgent, there are deeper issues to be addressed. Creating established boundaries for all your relationships and being consistent with them will build better, healthier connections. Plus, you can teach the next generations to be better.

Adulting. Unfortunately, we all must adult. It's not fun. We have to pay bills. We have to maintain cars and homes. We have to clean the bathroom (or hire a cleaner that we have to pay). We have to get out of bed and do our job. We must deal with the public. Too many "musts." And while these can be overwhelming, we make a choice every day to choose life or death. We move forward, finding joy in the little blessing, or we focus on the ugly around us. We can't give up adulting, but we can bring honor, love, peace, and joy to those around us and our circumstances. If we find ways to add value to our adulting, we remove ourselves from the constant busyness.

So the challenge for today is to evaluate where you are busy for busy sake. Learn what you can cull from your life and what is bringing value. Good luck!

Until Next Time,

DJ